Wednesday, April 27, 2011

God’s Sense of Humor on Easter Weekend

It just figures.  Both my younger boys harvested their turkeys on opening day of youth season and so, according to the rules, they aren’t able to hunt again with their 2nd turkey tag until the 2nd week of regular season.  That gave dad a great opportunity to hunt in the turkey woods in total peace the first weekend of regular season.  No more worrying about getting to the woods while the kid’s gun, shells, or turkey tag is still at home on the table.  No more listening to wining because we are out of snacks.  No more listening to complaining because the Gameboy video player ran out of batteries.  Just dad and the great outdoors….and then God went and showed his sense of humor.  You see, it was supposed to be Easter but oh no,… instead of flowers, sunshine, Easter eggs, and turkey hunting we had a return of Noah and the Ark (and apparently all the turkeys were already on board the boat at Lake Spring, Missouri!) 

Eight of the twelve Anti-Sleep Monsters. Turkey hunting was a drowsy undertaking after a night with this rowdy bunch!

After finally getting to bed around midnight I awoke at 4:30 am to the sound of video games in the family room and Niagara Falls running off the gutters as the rain pounded on the roof.  Neither are encouraging sounds when looking for a good nights rest before turkey hunting.  After gathering all my hunting equipment and wading through the family room that smelled of wet mules from all the soaked teenagers sleeping on the floor, chairs, and couches, I got out the door heading for the farm.  By the time I got in the truck I smelled like a wet mule as well from the soaking I took running from the house.  “It will stop by the time I get to the farm,” I thought, wishfully thinking to myself.  But, by the time I got to Lake Spring it was raining even harder!  The trip from the truck to the ground blind was more of a swim than a hike…and those wet mules were in the ground blind with me all morning.  That was the prophetic beginning to my 3 days of turkey hunting bliss!

Taking their direction from the older boys, the 7 year old bunch put on ornery grins knowing that one day soon they too will be terrorizing the neighborhood at 11:00 pm during turkey season.
 
Saturday morning the wind had joined the rain as God’s sense of humor added insult to injury.  And while I did manage to hear a few gobbles, I’m still not convinced that they weren’t just ducks impersonating turkeys.  For 4 hours I sat in the ground blind calling every 20 minutes as the rain beat down so hard and loud that I could hardly hear my own calling let alone a gobbler answering my calls!  The wet mules were still in the ground blind too.

Even with wet-mule smelling anti-sleep monster teenagers controlling the home-front the weekend was not a total loss. There were morels waiting for me around the ground blind...I just had to get even more soaked to get them!

Finally, Easter Sunday morning arrived.  The night before the weather forecast had called for a brief intermission to the rain sometime Sunday morning.  Of course all the way to the farm and all the way to the ground blind it poured.  I promised my wife that I would leave by 9:30 am in order to get back to town for Easter Sunday family activities.  As I sat in the ground blind calling I was watching my watch and waiting for the rain to stop, as had been forecasted.  At 9:15 while it was still pouring rain I began packing up all the decoys and gathering all my equipment for the trip home.  At that time I had not heard a turkey all mourning long (I hadn’t heard anything but the sound or rain hitting the top of the blind!)  Now, this is no joke – at 9:25 am the rain stopped as I was exiting the ground blind. As I walked up the edge of the woods shaking my head in disgusted disbelief that the rain stopped just as I was leaving, I had walked about 30 yards from the blind and a turkey gobbled in the distance! Yes, God and Mother Nature have a sense of humor!  So says the One-Eyed Hillbilly.




My PhotoGreg Stephens is a 35-year veteran & life-time student of the great outdoors. His column appears weekly in print & online publications. You can email him at gregstephens@one-eyedhillbilly.com. For more columns go to www.one-eyedhillbilly.blogspot.com.



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